I've Been reading articles about codependent relationships and dependant relationships and its kinda opened my eyes. Being conscious of it now and the realisation has put things into perspective. I do feel like I’ve lost a little bit of myself since being involve and being in a relationship and i want to find that back or at least figure out what I want in my life right now. Its my fault too tbh I’ve procrastinated so much in my life that i really don’t know how to find the motivation anymore. I want to do something for me, for ME to be proud of for OTHERS to be proud of. Being with Ainsley is amazing and life is filled with warmth and happiness but I mostly only feel that when I’m with him and that feeling slowly disappears when I’m left alone again, wondering what to do to and how to pass time until i see him again. I’m glad i see this now but also it saddens me to the core because this makes me seem weak but thats probably the pessimist in me speaking...
I want to be able to be OK by myself - I mean I used to be but now that I've found my soul mate and other half its kinda hard to detach from that sometimes...
love YOU
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